6 designs

Toi et Moi Engagement Rings

Two stones, side by side: you and me. The toi et moi dates to Napoleon's proposal to Josephine in 1796, and its two-stone asymmetry has made it one of the most talked-about designs of recent years.

Choose the shape of the centre stone first. Our diamond shapes guide shows how each outline behaves; then read the diamond 4Cs guide to understand what you are paying for. Every setting here can be made in platinum, 18ct or 9ct gold, with a certified natural or lab-grown centre. Every ring is ethically crafted with transparent pricing and a complimentary resize in the first year, backed by free, no-pressure advice from our London team.

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Choosing a toi et moi ring

A toi et moi sets two stones side by side, and the design depends on how those two relate. Matching shapes and sizes give a balanced, symmetrical ring. Contrasting ones, such as a pear beside an oval or a diamond beside a sapphire, give it character and a deliberate asymmetry. Neither is right or wrong, but it helps to decide which you want before comparing individual stones. Our diamond shapes guide shows how each outline looks and how shapes pair.

If one of the stones is a coloured gemstone, check that it will wear as well as the diamond beside it. Sapphire and ruby are hard enough for daily wear; softer stones such as emerald or morganite need more care and a more protective setting. Our gemstone durability guide explains which stones suit an everyday ring.

Think about the wedding band early. Because the two stones sit across the finger, a straight band often cannot sit flush beside a toi et moi, and a shaped or fitted band may be the better match. Our guide to shaped-to-fit bands explains when shaping is needed. If you already have a particular pair of stones in mind, we can design the ring around them: see the bespoke process.